Today has not been a really good day. It is setting in how dire things are and though I have faith that things are getting better, today was not one of them. Now, I can bitch and moan about how bad things are and that will not help me much. Oh hell what am I saying YES it will help! Damn damn damn and damn it again. Today I had to go to a food bank. Now that is not all that bad in this economy, but it is difficult for someone who sent people there in need is having to utilize it. Okay on the funny side, and there is one, there are some very interesting people who frequent the food banks. In line I saw an over 60 (and I mean she was probably 70ish) standing in line with slouch boots tights and short shorts. Very sweet but the look was not quite to be expected. People driving expensive cars, some with drivers living in Brentwood, old people, young people, Black, White and Latino so I guess I am in good company. During the intake I was greeted by a wonderful woman who, when I talked about my background, exclaimed."hell I would hire you in a minute. Then came the dreaded words..."if we had the money" Yes those words have been drilled in my head for the past 2 years. If we only had the money.... Okay, now I was brought up that we were the Chosen People. So if we were so Chosen, why haven't I been.. You need to say the last line out loud with a Jewish accent whatever that means!
Anyway, I was told to keep up my spirits that I would be hired soon and given 3 bags of food much of it I can't eat but am grateful to be able to share it with some friends who can and need it too. I guess the tough part is trying hard to combat a deep depression while all the time trying to believe I am a valued person in society which becomes more frustrating the longer I am without a job. Yes there are people far worse off than I. At least I have friends that care, have a roof over my head and food in the fridge so who am I to complain. But those who know me, I would not be me if I at least did not complain a little bit.
I know tomorrow will be another day, and yes things will get better, and yes, I am loved, and yes, there is a job out there just waiting for me and YES THERE IS HOPE!. So my question to God is, and this is such an old joke....So if things are this bad and we are the Chosen People....God....Can you PLEASE chose someone else for a change!